Divorce brings about a roller coaster of emotions like fear, anger and/or loss. And it is comforting to know that whatever you are feeling IS normal and others do experience similarly. Divorce brings about grief - grief of many things. Loss of the marriage, loss of your family, loss of the dreams you had and SO MUCH MORE. While we all grieve differently and for different reasons it is important to understand what the stages are and how they work.
Grief is a close counterpart of divorce recovery; expect it and allow it. You’re going to grieve the loss of the identity of what you thought your family would look like, the loss of love and companionship and the end of life as you knew it.
You may feel like grief brings nothing but pain, but this is temporary. It’s also necessary, and you’ll discover hidden silver linings and blessings within it. Grief is a process, and as you move through the journey, you will get stronger.
That’s why you need to embrace grief and allow it to happen. What are some of the ways grief will manifest itself in our lives? How do we move through grief and recover from it? In this episode, I talk about grief and why it’s the path to healing and recovery.
3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode
What denial looks like
Denial is a normal stage in divorce. It often makes you feel numb or disconnected from what’s going on. Although you may give the appearance that all things are normal, you may just be letting the motions of your day to day carry you through instead of dealing with your emotions.
How to address anger
Our own anger is usually connected to the anger of other people that we’ve internalized. This could be our kids’ anger about breaking up the family, and our exes being angry at us for instigating the divorce. If you find yourself lashing out more, ask for support and for professional help
Why there’s no perfect way to grieve a divorce
Decide your own course, even if others don’t approve of it. Don’t try to fit your grieving into someone else’s opinion of how you should be handling your sadness. Have self-compassion, be patient with yourself and make sure you’re taking care of yourself mentally, emotionally and spiritually.