Setbacks

podcast Jun 03, 2020

 

Healing from divorce is certainly not linear. You will have highs, lows and setbacks that trick you into believing that you’re regressing. It’s normal to crave an end to the challenges. 

 

But setbacks are actually necessary. They are an important part of your road to recovery, and the path to a bigger and better outcome. Ultimately, setbacks help us set up for a comeback!

 

In order to recover from the end of our marriage, we’re going to relive some of our hardest moments, but also get the chance to deal with all the emotions and repercussions so that we can step into the next chapter healed.

 

How do we change how we react and respond to setbacks? What steps can we take to make sure our process of dealing with divorce is not self-destructive? In this episode, I share how setbacks help us heal and how to come to terms with divorce in a healthy way. 

 

3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode 

 

Why you...

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How to Successfully Negotiate with a Narcissist w/Rebecca Zung

podcast May 27, 2020

Going through a divorce is a difficult process as it is, no matter the circumstances or the people involved. Dealing with a narcissistic former partner doesn’t make things any easier. 

 

A lot of the time, narcissists are determined to make the divorce process even harder than it needs to be, by withholding documents, filing a huge number of complaints and refusing to cooperate.

 

It can seem counterintuitive if we are trying to avoid conflict, but when it comes to divorcing a narcissist, the best thing we can do is be prepared for a fight. 

 

How can we negotiate with a narcissist and do we even stand a chance of winning? 

 

On this episode, top divorce attorney, bestselling author and media personality, Rebecca Zung shares how to negotiate with a narcissist and win!

 

 

3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode 

 

How to identify different types of narcissists

Narcissist is a broadly-used term. We have to be able...

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Self-Compassion

Uncategorized May 20, 2020

One thing I’ve discovered is that we are so often very unkind and judgmental of ourselves, in a way we’d never be to anybody else. We also tend to be unkind to ourselves when we need self-love and self-acceptance the most. 

 

Our lack of self-compassion makes it harder for us to move through hard and challenging times like divorce. 

 

You see, true self-love and acceptance goes beyond self-esteem and feeling good about ourselves when things are going well. We need to give ourselves kindness when we fail or things don’t go as planned. It comes to caring about ourselves no matter how fragile or imperfect we are. 

 

What is the difference between self-love and self-compassion? How do we embrace self-compassion and maintain it through the highs and lows of our lives? In this episode, I talk about the power of self-compassion and the steps we can take to achieve it. 

 

 

3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode 

...

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How The Better Apart Method Can Help You Heal in Divorce w/Gabrielle Hartley

podcast May 13, 2020

The portrayal of divorce in the media doesn’t put people going through a split on a healthy or healing path. An acrimonious and bitter divorce does not create the inner narratives that bring emotional freedom or the legacy we want to give our children. 

 

We require a space for patience and positivity, a process that will improve our lives going forward. This is where the Better Apart Method comes in. 

 

What steps do we need to take to heal and live more wholeheartedly after a divorce? How do mantras envelope our thinking and change our way of being? How do we grieve our marriages in a constructive way? 

 

In this episode, I’m joined by divorce lawyer mediator, author, speaker and founder of the Better Apart Method, Gabrielle Hartley. She talks about a different approach to divorce, and why it’s changing lives.

 

3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode 

 

  • How to go from reacting in a heightened state to...
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You are NOT Your Results

Uncategorized May 07, 2020

Today I want to talk about something I heard and learned that profoundly moved me and that simple phrase was “You are not your results."  I remember thinking – YES I AM!  How many of you think the same thing? My results define what I’ve done, what I’ve accomplished, who I am.  And if my results are not that, then what are they?

How many of you have struggled with not feeling enough?  So many of us struggle with this internally – Why? The world we live in today is results-oriented and we are either rewarded or punished based on our outcomes or results.  Rewards come in the form of praise, money, admiration, love, to name a few. And punishment comes in the form of judgement, isolation, rejection, ridicule, etc.  How many of you growing up received a reward for good grades? We learned very young that rewards come with results – big ones. So we become accustomed to striving for...

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Narcissism: The 3 Things That Drive A Narcissist

podcast May 06, 2020

Divorcing a narcissistic spouse has its own unique set of issues and emotions. If we’re not equipped to deal with them, the breaking up and co-parenting process can be incredibly frustrating, especially when we’ve woken up to who this person truly is. 

 

When narcissists realize that they are losing their pedestal status, we see another side of them, a side that’s actually triggered by fear. You see, a narcissist is terrified of what their identity means without the way we see them. 

 

What actually drives a narcissist’s behavior? How do we cope with their manipulation tactics? In this episode, I talk about how to avoid falling into the old patterns with a narcissist, and how to stand in our own power. 

 

 

3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode 

  • The truth about narcissism and why a narcissist’s ego is their only protection they have from the world. 
  • How to overcome the manipulation of narcissists,...
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How to Pivot From Stuck in the Past to Looking Forward In Your Divorce Process w/Susan Guthrie

podcast Apr 29, 2020

Divorce can truly be the greatest gift that we can give ourselves. Many people going through it are so focused on what they think they’ve lost, that they are completely unaware of what they are gaining. 

 

This leads to them focusing on the past and seeking some way to punish themselves or their soon-to-be ex, instead of looking forward to their next best chapter. It’s so critical to start to change the focus so that we come out on the other side happier and ready to create the life we want. 

 

What is the difference between emotional reactions and practical responses? How do we set ourselves up for a less negative divorce process? In this episode, I’m joined by nationally recognized Family Law and Mediation Attorney and podcast host, Susan Guthrie. She draws on 30 years of helping clients and her own divorce experience, and shares the roadmap to getting through divorce. 



 

3 Things We Learned From This Episode

 

The difference...

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Let Go Of Fear

podcast Apr 22, 2020

Sometimes it feels like society tells us that showing our pain is a sign of weakness, and this is especially true for people going through a divorce. 

 

We put pressure on ourselves to portray an image that we’re doing great even when we’re having a hard time. 

 

There is no template for how we should look or feel as we struggle through the pain of divorce, but the truth is, we will struggle with sadness, loneliness, doubt and fear. 

 

Part of my work is to take the shame and embarrassment out of divorce to allow and give permission for women to feel their pain without feeling weak. How do we cope with the hard days of divorce? How can we rediscover ourselves and also stop feeling ashamed of having those bad days? 

 

In this episode, I share how to navigate the emotions of divorce and reasons to appreciate this new season in your life. 

 



 

3 Things We Learned From This Episode

 

You are allowed to feel crappy...

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It’s OK Not to Be OK

podcast Apr 22, 2020

Sometimes it feels like society tells us that showing our pain is a sign of weakness, and this is especially true for people going through a divorce. 

 

We put pressure on ourselves to portray an image that we’re doing great even when we’re having a hard time. 

 

There is no template for how we should look or feel as we struggle through the pain of divorce, but the truth is, we will struggle with sadness, loneliness, doubt and fear. 

 

Part of my work is to take the shame and embarrassment out of divorce to allow and give permission for women to feel their pain without feeling weak. How do we cope with the hard days of divorce? How can we rediscover ourselves and also stop feeling ashamed of having those bad days? 

 

In this episode, I share how to navigate the emotions of divorce and reasons to appreciate this new season in your life. 

 

3 Things We Learned From This Episode

 

You are allowed to feel crappy as you...

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How to Tame Your Inner Critic & Live On Your Own Terms

podcast Apr 22, 2020

We all have self-criticism and self-sabotaging voices that hold us back, the dreaded inner critic. This voice wants to make us more acceptable to others by criticizing and correcting our behavior, so we don’t get rejected or hurt. 

 

They are built on expectations placed on us by parents, caregivers, peers and the media; not on what actually fulfills us. It’s an attempt to control you by molding you to the world’s criteria and that you’re broken. You’re not broken, you’ve just been believing your inner critic for far too long. 

 

If you’re struggling with negative self-talk and wondering how to silence those voices, what are the first steps you need to take? How do we separate ourselves from our inner critics? 

 

On this episode, I talk about how to stop succumbing to the pressure of the inner critic, how to actually work with your inner critic to get more desirable outcomes and see the voices as a catalyst...

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