Bad relationships drain us of our happiness, purpose, and most of all, our best selves. When people leave an abusive or traumatic relationship, they may feel like strangers to themselves. So often, we find that we can’t recognize who we became in that situation, and it feels impossible to reconnect with ourselves.
Divorce is a powerful catalyst for taking the journey to self-rediscovery. We get to make changes to our lives on our own terms, break out of the box we were in, and unlock all the amazing and unique things that make us who we are.
I know it’s hard to see through the fog of fear and doubt after a marriage ends, but trust me. On the other side is more joy and authenticity than you could ever imagine.
Why do bad relationships take so much from us? How can we start reclaiming ourselves after losing our identity? In this episode, I’m joined by coach and founder of the You Get To Be You This Time program, Veronika Archer. We talk about...
WHAT IS A NARCISSIST?
“Narcissism” has become the go-to word when describing the personality types that are characterized by selfishness, entitlement, validation-seeking, and lack of empathy. In today’s society, we hear the words ‘Narcissist’ or ‘Narcissism’ tossed around casually to describe the people whom we find obnoxiously pompous and arrogant. Although these descriptions may be accurate, these individuals might actually be living with, what clinicians call, Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
In order for an individual to be diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder as defined by the DSM-5, he or she must meet the following criterion:
Going through a divorce doesn’t just make us question ourselves, it can also shake our faith tremendously. It’s normal to ask our Higher Power why this is happening to us, and what we did to deserve this pain.
It can feel like the Universe is working against us, and that can make us want to turn our back on our faith, but this is when we need it the most. Faith is how we see past our temporary darkness and believe in the light ahead of us. Faith is how we stop being a victim of divorce and realize that this is happening to help us, not hurt us.
You’re meant for more than your unhappy marriage, and you’re meant for more than the pain you’re experiencing right now. When we can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, all we can do is step out on the faith of knowing that the Universe has our back.
How can we lean into our faith as we go through a divorce? Why is it so important for us not to hold onto fear and suffering? In this...
Many of us worry that divorce will have long lasting negative impacts on our kids, that the trauma to our kids is inevitable. But if we come at the process from a place of love and understanding, we can minimize the trauma and stop it from affecting them in the long run.
That’s not always easy when we’ve already established a contentious dynamic with our exes.
It all comes down to keeping our children at the center of our decisions. If we agree to focus on our children's best interests, we can escape the true cause of long-term trauma: nasty litigation.
How can we shift from a bitter dispute to an amicable co-parenting relationship?
In this episode, host of the critically acclaimed The Divorce Survival Guide Podcast, Kate Anthony explains how putting our kids at the center of our divorce can make for a more amicable split.
3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode
How inner work fosters a friendlier dynamic
To create an...
When we go through a break up or divorce, sometimes it’s just easier to focus on what’s wrong with you and your life vs. what’s positive and going well. When we take the time to consider the good instead of focusing on the bad, we start to see how beautiful life is and how we are taking steps to move forward.
I recently read an article where Robert Emmons, Ph.D., a leading scientific expert on gratitude, talked about how in times of crisis, gratefulness is not only helpful, but essential. He states that, “It is precisely under crisis conditions when we have the most to gain by a grateful perspective on life. In the face of demoralization, gratitude has the power to energize. In the face of brokenness, gratitude has the power to heal. In the face of despair, gratitude has the power to bring hope. In other words, gratitude can help us cope with hard times.”
Whether you’re currently working with a mediator or divorce lawyer, wondering...
As a woman who is observant and has led a somewhat observant lifestyle (except for a crab or lobster roll here and there), divorce presented an interesting hiccup. You see, in Judaism it takes a lot more than lawyers, a judge and a final divorce decree to declare your divorce is final. It involves uncoupling in the eyes of G-d via a get, or a divorce document, handed to the woman by the man in front of witnesses and a Jewish court. And with it comes a lot of old school of thought challenges, outdated customs plus a spiritual “cutting of the cord” that changed me from that day forward.
When a Jewish woman and man get married, part of the wedding planning process involves picking out a ketubah, or a Jewish marriage contract. The ketubahis signed before the ceremony, and its purpose is to outline the rights and responsibilities of the groom to his bride. It is typically framed like a work of art and displayed in your home – I always joked...
I know every single one of you have heard a flight attendant say “put your oxygen mask on first before you put one on your child.” Or perhaps the old saying “you can’t pour from an empty pitcher.” Either way, these are TRUE statements meant to reinforce WHY you get to take care of yourself first. #TRUTHBOMB - the reason being is that if you don’t, you are truly no good to anyone else.
And I know I know . . . COVID, divorce, life, kids, job, money, family, school etc. You are not alone in feeling like you are barely keeping your head above water and self-care or as I like to call it, self-investment, feels like a luxuryvs. a necessity. Right now, sleep is all you can manage and even that isn’t going so well.
Throughout your divorce process, no matter where you are at, everything about life and those who depend on you (aka your kids) feel really urgent. Your mediation is coming up, you have documents to...
A lot of us think signing divorce papers will give us a sense of relief, but that isn’t always the case. Many women continue to feel a deep connection to their exes even after paperwork has been finalized.
For women who have experienced this sensation, it’s more than missing a former spouse, it’s a deep, energetic pull. It’s a feeling of being bound to someone, even though we’re trying to move forward.
During romantic relationships, we share DNA with another person and ultimately parts of our souls are taken on by our partners, creating a powerful bond. Once the relationship ends, is it possible to sever that connection for good?
ThetaHealing® is a meditation process that promotes healing in multiple areas of life, including long-standing connections between former spouses. In this episode, I share my experiences of ThetaHealing®, as both a practitioner and a patient.
3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode
The biggest challenge in any divorce, next to the emotional fallout, tends to be finances.
From the fear of going down to one income to how the new financial dynamic will impact our children, it’s perfectly natural to worry about the financial implications of splitting up.
Those fears come from a place of uncertainty because divorce is such a significant change in so many aspects of our lives.
In divorce, especially when it comes to finances, it’s critical that we intentionally design an exit strategy instead of being emotionally reactive. If not, we risk making the process harder, more expensive, and more emotionally draining than it needs to be.
How do we start the process of financially planning for life after divorce? How can we address the financial fears that come with divorce? What can we do to navigate an ex who shows love by buying things for the kids?
In this episode, I’m joined by Certified Divorce Coach® and Divorce Financial...
As we go through divorce, we’re going to experience our fair share of difficult emotions that make joy and peace feel out of reach. This includes bitterness and resentment.
While it’s normal to harbor some negativity towards our marriages and our exes, we can end up stuck and unable to heal or move forward.
As the saying goes, being resentful is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to be affected by it. Being bitter means you’re letting the past continue to hurt you and dictate how you feel. Letting that resentment go is critical if we want to find peace, joy and happiness.
It seems easier said than done to let go of the resentment you’ve held onto for so long, but you have way more control of it than anyone else does.
Why does resentment make it impossible for us to see our divorce as a gift? How can we start to reframe what makes us feel bitter and turn it into something that makes us grateful? In this episode, I talk about...