I Left My Marriage With Nothing & It Was The Best Thing That Ever Happened to Me w/Sonia Queralt

podcast Jun 24, 2020

Living in an unhappy marriage and going through the process of divorce can feel like a constant internal tug-of-war, filled with guilt, regret and feelings of failure. The truth is, divorce is brutal and life changing and there is just no way around that. 

 

But that doesn’t mean that being divorced is worse than staying in your marriage. Divorce doesn’t have to just be something you can survive. It can be the launching pad for the life you really want, and the catalyst for your incredible next chapter. 

 

Divorce has its inevitable hard moments, but it’s worth fighting for your happiness, finding your inner voice and balance again. But to get there, we’re going to need to go through guilt and the reactions of our loved ones. 

 

How can we avoid getting caught up in a downward spiral of guilt and shame? How do we deal with the reactions of our loved ones? In this episode, divorce litigator, divorce survivor and co-founder of...

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Advice for the Hard Days: Experiencing the Milestones of Life After Your Divorce

podcast Jun 17, 2020

Whether you wanted your divorce, saw it coming or not, life after splitting up won’t look the same as before. You’ll feel this especially and significantly when you have to experience your first big milestone post-divorce. For me it was my son’s graduation. 

 

Leading up to it, there were so many raging emotions that made me dread the day. 

 

Then I realized that I was allowing my past to dictate my present. I was letting anger and fear control me. We always have the power to choose what to do. How do we handle milestones within our new reality? What does moving on after divorce actually look like? How can we start to come from love and compassion instead of fear and anger towards our ex? 

 

In this episode, I talk about an important lesson I learned as I experienced a challenging post-divorce day.

 

3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode 

 

How to cut your emotional tether to your ex

When we are constantly...

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Finding Peace During Uncertainty

podcast Jun 10, 2020

One of the toughest challenges of going through a divorce is answering the question “what comes next”, and adjusting to the fear of not knowing the answer. 

 

The truth is we grow and find peace when we lean into the fear of the unknown instead of trying to actively avoid it and be in control all the time.  Surrendering is key. 

 

But that means we have to sit with our uncertainty, instead of clinging to how things used to be or how they should be. It’s okay to feel nervous and uncomfortable when everything is changing. The problem arises when we try to fight the fear. How do we come to peace with the unknowns that come with divorce?  

 

In this episode, I talk about how we can become more comfortable with uncertainty and maintain greater inner peace.  

 

 

3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode 

 

The danger of telling ourselves stories when we feel uncertain 

When we feel...

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Setbacks

podcast Jun 03, 2020

 

Healing from divorce is certainly not linear. You will have highs, lows and setbacks that trick you into believing that you’re regressing. It’s normal to crave an end to the challenges. 

 

But setbacks are actually necessary. They are an important part of your road to recovery, and the path to a bigger and better outcome. Ultimately, setbacks help us set up for a comeback!

 

In order to recover from the end of our marriage, we’re going to relive some of our hardest moments, but also get the chance to deal with all the emotions and repercussions so that we can step into the next chapter healed.

 

How do we change how we react and respond to setbacks? What steps can we take to make sure our process of dealing with divorce is not self-destructive? In this episode, I share how setbacks help us heal and how to come to terms with divorce in a healthy way. 

 

3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode 

 

Why you...

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How to Successfully Negotiate with a Narcissist w/Rebecca Zung

podcast May 27, 2020

Going through a divorce is a difficult process as it is, no matter the circumstances or the people involved. Dealing with a narcissistic former partner doesn’t make things any easier. 

 

A lot of the time, narcissists are determined to make the divorce process even harder than it needs to be, by withholding documents, filing a huge number of complaints and refusing to cooperate.

 

It can seem counterintuitive if we are trying to avoid conflict, but when it comes to divorcing a narcissist, the best thing we can do is be prepared for a fight. 

 

How can we negotiate with a narcissist and do we even stand a chance of winning? 

 

On this episode, top divorce attorney, bestselling author and media personality, Rebecca Zung shares how to negotiate with a narcissist and win!

 

 

3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode 

 

How to identify different types of narcissists

Narcissist is a broadly-used term. We have to be able...

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Self-Compassion

Uncategorized May 20, 2020

One thing I’ve discovered is that we are so often very unkind and judgmental of ourselves, in a way we’d never be to anybody else. We also tend to be unkind to ourselves when we need self-love and self-acceptance the most. 

 

Our lack of self-compassion makes it harder for us to move through hard and challenging times like divorce. 

 

You see, true self-love and acceptance goes beyond self-esteem and feeling good about ourselves when things are going well. We need to give ourselves kindness when we fail or things don’t go as planned. It comes to caring about ourselves no matter how fragile or imperfect we are. 

 

What is the difference between self-love and self-compassion? How do we embrace self-compassion and maintain it through the highs and lows of our lives? In this episode, I talk about the power of self-compassion and the steps we can take to achieve it. 

 

 

3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode 

...

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How The Better Apart Method Can Help You Heal in Divorce w/Gabrielle Hartley

podcast May 13, 2020

The portrayal of divorce in the media doesn’t put people going through a split on a healthy or healing path. An acrimonious and bitter divorce does not create the inner narratives that bring emotional freedom or the legacy we want to give our children. 

 

We require a space for patience and positivity, a process that will improve our lives going forward. This is where the Better Apart Method comes in. 

 

What steps do we need to take to heal and live more wholeheartedly after a divorce? How do mantras envelope our thinking and change our way of being? How do we grieve our marriages in a constructive way? 

 

In this episode, I’m joined by divorce lawyer mediator, author, speaker and founder of the Better Apart Method, Gabrielle Hartley. She talks about a different approach to divorce, and why it’s changing lives.

 

3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode 

 

  • How to go from reacting in a heightened state to...
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You are NOT Your Results

Uncategorized May 07, 2020

Today I want to talk about something I heard and learned that profoundly moved me and that simple phrase was “You are not your results."  I remember thinking – YES I AM!  How many of you think the same thing? My results define what I’ve done, what I’ve accomplished, who I am.  And if my results are not that, then what are they?

How many of you have struggled with not feeling enough?  So many of us struggle with this internally – Why? The world we live in today is results-oriented and we are either rewarded or punished based on our outcomes or results.  Rewards come in the form of praise, money, admiration, love, to name a few. And punishment comes in the form of judgement, isolation, rejection, ridicule, etc.  How many of you growing up received a reward for good grades? We learned very young that rewards come with results – big ones. So we become accustomed to striving for...

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Narcissism: The 3 Things That Drive A Narcissist

podcast May 06, 2020

Divorcing a narcissistic spouse has its own unique set of issues and emotions. If we’re not equipped to deal with them, the breaking up and co-parenting process can be incredibly frustrating, especially when we’ve woken up to who this person truly is. 

 

When narcissists realize that they are losing their pedestal status, we see another side of them, a side that’s actually triggered by fear. You see, a narcissist is terrified of what their identity means without the way we see them. 

 

What actually drives a narcissist’s behavior? How do we cope with their manipulation tactics? In this episode, I talk about how to avoid falling into the old patterns with a narcissist, and how to stand in our own power. 

 

 

3 Things You’ll Love About This Episode 

  • The truth about narcissism and why a narcissist’s ego is their only protection they have from the world. 
  • How to overcome the manipulation of narcissists,...
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How to Pivot From Stuck in the Past to Looking Forward In Your Divorce Process w/Susan Guthrie

podcast Apr 29, 2020

Divorce can truly be the greatest gift that we can give ourselves. Many people going through it are so focused on what they think they’ve lost, that they are completely unaware of what they are gaining. 

 

This leads to them focusing on the past and seeking some way to punish themselves or their soon-to-be ex, instead of looking forward to their next best chapter. It’s so critical to start to change the focus so that we come out on the other side happier and ready to create the life we want. 

 

What is the difference between emotional reactions and practical responses? How do we set ourselves up for a less negative divorce process? In this episode, I’m joined by nationally recognized Family Law and Mediation Attorney and podcast host, Susan Guthrie. She draws on 30 years of helping clients and her own divorce experience, and shares the roadmap to getting through divorce. 



 

3 Things We Learned From This Episode

 

The difference...

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